Foundations in the Doctrine of Marriage part 2

In this message we are going to Consider Submission, Love & Bitterness in Marriage defined by the Law of God as we look at the words of Colossians 3:16-19 in light of Ephesians 5. Contemplating the redemption of time ordained for the renewed and regenerated man and woman called in a commitment to a life of dominion through the help of the Holy Spirit within the God ordained union of Holy Matrimony. 

Remember when You are

freely enjoying the notes you are reading or freely listen…

SOME ONE IS STILL PAYING FOR IT

Contribute when you can to keep us growing and free

Subscribe to RNCM Podcast Feed

iTunes • Other 

CLICK HERE FOR OUR SUPPORT PAGE

MP3 AUDIO MESSAGE DOWN LOAD-Listen any time!

OR

Page for Streaming Message – You can follow along with study notes below!

This message is between our Worship Services:

 You may Click HERE for our Call to Worship, Psalms singing, Scriptural resuscitation and confessional agreements accompanying this message.

Our Worship is from the 1650 Scottish Metrical Psalter (SMP) and Scriptural resuscitations from the KJV or from our Own ‘Convocational Book of Doctrinal Resuscitations’.

Please feel free to get a copy of the words from any source and Worship with us.

Scottish Psalter 1650 : Free Download, Borrow, and Streaming : Internet Archive

Morning Bible Study

An Exposition of 2 Corinthians 10

(Measuring by the Rule)

MP3 AUDIO MESSAGE DOWN LOAD-Listen any time!

OR

Page for Streaming Message – You can follow along with study notes below!

And please always support the efforts of Christians that devote time in their lives for your spiritual well-being.

Eph_5:14  Wherefore he saith, Awake thou that sleepest, and arise from the dead, and Christ shall give thee light.
Eph 5:15  See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise,
Eph 5:16  Redeeming the time, because the days are evil.
Eph 5:17  Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is.
Eph 5:18  And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit;
Eph 5:19  Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord;
Eph 5:20  Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ;
Eph 5:21  Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.
Eph 5:22  Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Eph 5:23  For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
Eph 5:24  Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
Eph 5:25  Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
Eph 5:26  That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
Eph 5:27  That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
Eph 5:28  So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
Eph 5:29  For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
Eph 5:30  For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
Eph 5:31  For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
Eph 5:32  This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
Eph 5:33  Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.

Last week I talked about the transition of Eph chapter 5 as it moves from spiritual childhood and transitions into maturity as we have read in introduction today.
The renewed nature of believers, that act of regeneration which God works in us when we as Paul says here, are wakened to the light of Christ.

It is from the point of spiritual childhood in the renewal that we understand that we have value to Christ Jesus who is our Lord, we understand that He chose to save us, and that He wrote our name to be sealed and never blotted out from the book of life that has existed in the testimonies of heaven since before the foundation of the world.

God: Father, Son and Holy Spirit chose to have our name written there by the power of the Word, this knowledge is made known to us through a gift called faith which is given by grace and at that moment when we believe we comprehend the seal of the Holy Spirit.

As Paul said we are awake, light shines in the face of Jesus Christ. And in this awakening we start too look at the world differently, judgmentally and we acknowledge that the days are evil and the time of our life is fleeting to make an impact for the one who saved us, and we are resolved to ‘redeem the time’.
We look around and ask “what is the will of the Lord ?”
We desire the guidance of that Spirit which gave us faith, to we go to the Scripture, even if we have done so already and you.
And in the recognition of the teachings of Scripture, it’s God’s Word, His voice and the Spirit within that spiritual music, we recognize that there are laws, rules which God intends us to love Him by and to love our neighbor by, and by this knowledge we
Eph 5:21  Submit ourselves one to another in the fear of God.

Among the examples and guided ways of the Spirit what we immediately find in among the first examples in the Scriptural record the submission and love of the marriage relationship.

And leads us to Christ and essentially says this, ‘you will not fully understand the purpose of marriage without understanding the purpose of Christ’s life, death and redemption of His bride’.

we will have a better understanding of love from Christ’s love, and submission from the commandments given to the church.

See marriage is one way in which the awakened, renewed person can redeem the time in evil days.
So often this is not the way we consider an evil world, we often as so many apocalyptical Christian teach contrary, we think ‘well the days are evil’ why should I get married and have children?
But that is not where the Law of God or the inspired apostles leads us, no rather the most basic element in society and that elemental union of a male and a female created in the image of God together, renewed in the likeness of God in goodness, righteousness and truth together, joined flesh of flesh and bone of bone in a homogenous union sanctified by the Word of God and blessed with the dominion-izing Holy Spirit is rather the answer Paul gives us to the question we circumspectly ask wisely ‘How do we redeem the time because the days are evil?”
The answer by all of these things is in a foundation of godly marriage.

Marriage, done right, marriage done God’s way, marriage as it was originally designed- and able to be accomplished if renewed men and renewed women would get far rid of all the foreign material smuggled into marriage with, as Paul prior listed ‘fornication, all uncleanness, or covetousness- for these are an idolatry.

Let’s Turn to another Apostolic chapter dealing with marriage: Col 3
I would like to draw attention to the flow of this chapter, and like we looked at prior in Ephesians 5 so does this scripture parallel the context, it is obvious that the Ephesians epistle went to Ephesian churches while this epistle went to Colossian church, both teaching the same message in the body.

Col_3:16  Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord.
Col 3:17  And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.
Col 3:18  Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.
Col 3:19  Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

If we read Ephesians 4-5-6 against Col 3-4 you would see a similar near Identical message with different nuances, different emphases of similar importance.
Look at ch. 3.

I want to lay an important duel understand of what was stated in Eph 5, that in our consideration of marriage we are speaking of.
And that is that Christ and the church is a concept that is just as represented in what we talk about in marriage as when we explore and put into practice all the law God out-lined for us concerning marriage.

In understanding a man’s responsibility to his wife, we see what Christ never failingly does for us His bride.
And in considering what submission the wife is called to, we as men place our selves in her submissive situation bound to the word of our husband and head who is Christ.

according to verse 3:16-17 of Col:
Christ’s Word is to dwell, Christ is the Word and the Word is spoken of as seed, the word of truth, the Law and the Gospel are his, the same seed, the Scripture dwelling in us, is conception, brings forth wisdom and we become more wise, we are taught of it’s truth it admonishes us in the way that we should go.

And as stated:
Col 3:17  And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him. 

Luk_8:11  Now the parable is this: The seed is the word of God.
…
Luk 8:15  But that on the good ground are they, which in an honest and good heart, having heard the word, keep it, and bring forth fruit with patience.

We are also told that:

Jas 1:18  Of his own will begat he us with the word of truth, that we should be a kind of firstfruits of his creatures.

The church has the spiritual seed of the word, the word of Christ dwelling in them richly and the text implores us to let it dwell in us in all wisdom.

This is marital language, this is fruit producing language.

The seed of the word planted in our spiritual loving heart brings for spiritual wisdom, the child the fruit of a loving union between Christ and His Church. If the Word is removed from the midst of the Church then the fruit of Christ the head and husband of the church cannot be conceived to bring forth.

teaching and admonishing one another

This comes from Scripture: in psalms and hymns , found in scripture and spiritual songs, singing with grace, melodies made of the pure words of scripture which are conceived in your hearts unto the Lord.
Col 3:17  And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him. 
The name of the Son is upon us, we are his bride he hath purchased us betrothed us, we are his and it is through His mediation as our head that thanks is offered by God’s Spirit unto the Father.
And here is our example of marriage:

Col 3:18  Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. 

Col 3:19  Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. 

Let me ask this foundational marriage question, to Wives / Soon to be Wives  and the Church ye bride of Christ:
How do you know how to submit yourself to your husbands as it is fit in the Lord?

Husbands, soon to be husbands / Christ is our example,
How are we to love our wives, and be not bitter against them?
By what standard do we judge these things?
By what standard are we taught and admonished in these things
and are we to teaching and admonishing one another?

Christ is the Word, and the seed is the word of God, the word of truth, the Law and the Gospel are the same seed, the Scripture dwelling in us brings forth wisdom and we become more wise, teaching us of it’s truth and admonishing us in the way we should go.

Col 3:18  Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. 

So ought wives to submit to their husbands in the bond of marriage in all that that entails, but also in listening to his word and submitting to his word and hearing the fitting things he teaches as are fit for his house. As the wife is to be fruitful and multiply he husbands seed, his line, his family, his clan, tribe and their joint nation and race with her physical body, in love and devotion to His people to whom she has become one flesh with, so her heart is to have the will of her husband conceived in her, dwelling in her, and Bonded to her will desire and being. One body, which the wife is the greater part in composition and the Husband leads in his submission to the Word of God faithfully.

Col_3:19  Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. 

So ought Husbands to love our wives, and be not bitter against them in all the giving of seed entails, not only in our responsibility to render due benevolence but to speak our word, our will and our desire, this is that we govern and lead, in being the head of our wife but to remember husbands are as well bound by ‘her’ obligation to submit as we prior read-to offer that which is fitting in the Lord as well.
We must offer seed from the word of God, the fitting things we teach must be brought forth from our submission to Christ and his seed in us His Word, Law and Gospel.

As the husband is to be fruitful and multiply his seed, his line, his family, his clan, tribe with his wife of joint nation and race through his physical seed, in love and devotion to His people to whom he has taken his wife into in becoming one flesh, so he desires that the will of Christ which is his will be conceived in her, dwelling in her, and Bonded to her will desire and being that in Christ the be One body in Him.
This is the love of wife.
Husbands according to this scripture are warned against bitterness, Why?
Because any one who is following God and commanded by God to be in a submissive position needs to be safe guarded against authoritative abuse.

Thus, the Apostle not only says Husbands love your wives, but also and with that love do not be bitter against them.

The Greek word for bitter is pik-rah’ee- no and it does mean bitter in the sense of a sharp taste
it is rooted in th word pik-ros’
sharp (pungent), that is, acrid (literally or figuratively): – bitter.
Now let me give you one of the few example of a scriptural use of this exact Greek and Hebrew concept in a marital situation, where I can feel confident that I have offered you the ind of the Lord to interpret the meaning Paul has given to husbands here in Col 3:19

Rth_1:13  Would ye tarry for them till they were grown? would ye stay for them from having husbands? nay, my daughters; for it grievethH4843 me much for your sakes that the hand of the LORD is gone out against me.
LXX: for it is made bitterG4087 to me exceedingly for you”

Rth 1:19  So they two went until they came to Bethlehem. And it came to pass, when they were come to Bethlehem, that all the city was moved about them, and they said, Is this Naomi?
Rth 1:20  And she said unto them, Call me not Naomi, call me Mara: for the Almighty hath dealt very bitterly with me.
LXX: Do not indeed call me Naomi! Call me, Bitter one!G4089  for the Mighty One has dealt very bitterlyG4087 with me.

Rth 1:21  I went out full, and the LORD hath brought me home again empty: why then call ye me Naomi, seeing the LORD hath testified against me, and the Almighty hath afflicted me?

So what is Paul instructing men herein? He is teaching us to not treat our wives, whom we are to love like widows.

What do we see Namoi Mara Bitterness having to endure?

1. the loss of her husband’s seed, though it had passed through her and gave life to two heirs, boys born to her body to her husbands tribe and lineage, in the death of those boys, those men those husbands, the line has ended- this is bitter to a wife who is devoted to her husband, submissive to him in a godly love.

2. We see the lose of Her provisions and the girls provisions, we see Ruth and Orphah striped of hope, and stripped of a provider, when Namomi-mara come Home to Bethlehem she is a poor, she has nothing, she is empty.
That is we are not to be dead beat husbands so to speak, rather we are to be alive in the Lord, of that renewed man, created in Righteousness and true holiness, we are to be alive in our provisions towards our wives, in body, and in spirit, in authority and headship we are to be alive as Christ is alive and resurrected from the dead so are we.
Kinsman redemption Deut 25, and in the justice imbued into the fabric of these laws are the principles of

Exo_21:9  And if he have betrothed her unto his son, he shall deal with her after the manner of daughters.
Exo 21:10  If he take him another wife; her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage, shall he not diminish.
Exo 21:11  And if he do not these three unto her, then shall she go out free without money.

The Law is speaking of how a wife is to be dealt with in general, and a woman who was betrothed or endowed to a man at a young age, was some times taken into the home of the family that woman was to marry, and the father of the son paid from inheritance the dowry for the woman as was the custom of the law, and that father was bound to not treat her any differently than a daughter was treated.
In v. 10 the obligates the son to whom this girl was betrothed.

The obligation is that this woman is bound as a wife to a husband and she by law was protected against bitterness of life, though she was subject to her husband.
She was guaranteed food or flesh, clothing, and the duty of marriage connubial companionship, this is to say that these are her rights.
and the law specifically is stating these three things are guaranteed, and that these 3 things ablity to be maintained, and if a man were to take another wife he is bound to not let that diminish at all, upon threat of losing his first wife.

look at:

1Co 7:2  Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
1Co_7:3  Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
1Co 7:4  The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
1Co_7:5  Defraud (LXX. Exo_21:10 diminishG650 ) ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

Let me tie these two foundations together, that of the physical and that of Spiritual.

Col 3:16  Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord.
Col 3:17  And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.
Col 3:18  Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.
Col 3:19  Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

Christ is the Word, and the seed is the word of God, the word of truth, the Law and the Gospel are the same seed, the Scripture dwelling in us brings forth wisdom and we become more wise, we are taught of it’s truth it admonishes us in the way that we should go.

Luk 8:11  Now the parable is this: The seed is the word of God.
Luk 8:12  Those by the way side are they that hear; then cometh the devil, and taketh away the word out of their hearts, lest they should believe and be saved.
Luk 8:13  They on the rock are they, which, when they hear, receive the word with joy; and these have no root, which for a while believe, and in time of temptation fall away.
Luk 8:14  And that which fell among thorns are they, which, when they have heard, go forth, and are choked with cares and riches and pleasures of this life, and bring no fruit to perfection.
Luk 8:15  But that on the good ground are they, which in an honest and good heart, having heard the word, keep it, and bring forth fruit with patience.
Luk 8:16  No man, when he hath lighted a candle, covereth it with a vessel, or putteth it under a bed; but setteth it on a candlestick, that they which enter in may see the light.
Luk 8:17  For nothing is secret, that shall not be made manifest; neither any thing hid, that shall not be known and come abroad.
Luk 8:18  Take heed therefore how ye hear: for whosoever hath, to him shall be given; and whosoever hath not, from him shall be taken even that which he seemeth to have.